I’m having imaginary boy troubles.
I sound crazy. Let me explain.
I have a boyfriend. For the sake of privacy, let’s call him J. So J and I have been going out for about a month now, but we have a long complex history that is way to crazy to get into right now. We are both exceptionally awkward but it’s okay. We’ve also had our ups and downs, but everything has always worked out in our favor.
Enter this other guy. Well not even enter. Let’s call him B.
To make and excruciatingly long story short, we all went to prom this past weekend and drama occurred between my brother’s prom date and B and everyone is upset about it. I’ll go into more detail about this drama in another post. I have a whole other rant just on that.
B and I aren’t really friends. We’re more friends of friends. My best friend talks to him a lot, he sits near me in two of my classes, and if we’re in a group context, I’ll talk to him. But we’re not quite friends.
After school today I went to grab lunch with my brother, his best friend, and mine. After eating and dropping everyone at home, I walked in the house, no plans and a full stomach in tow, and took a nap, per usual. During this nap, I had a dream. A damn good dream.
And this dream was about B.
In this dream, I was still dating J, but I went to a party and at the party I was hanging out with B. We were just talking and such, but he was kind of drunk. He started going around the party, talking to different groups of people and every time he moved, he would grab my hand and pull me along with him.
At one point, he took a seat and pulled me down into his lap (in a cute way not a creepy way). I was sitting there for a while, having fun and just thoroughly enjoying myself. Then I made eye contact with one of my friends, and they gave me a Dude what are you doing? look. So I got up off B’s lap and went over to join my friend.
But I was really sad the whole time.
That was basically how my dream ended, but throughout this dream, I kept waking up from my nap and without even thinking I would make myself go back to sleep because I didn’t want the dream to end and I wanted to keep hanging out with this Dream B.
After I fully woke up, I realized what was going on and got kind of mad at myself. But part of me still wanted to go back to that dream. Because even if I wasn’t dating someone. Even if he hadn’t cause a lot of drama with my brother. Even if B wasn’t the biggest flirt in the world and would never go for someone like me. We weren’t friends. We didn’t talk.
That is, until today.
Not 2 hours after this unexpected emotional roller coaster of a dream, B texts me.
He was texting me to figure out when he could apologize to my brother for the drama he caused and I helped him. From there we branched off into a three-hour conversation. We talked about classes, old memories, how crappy drama is. He said I’m wholesome in a way very few people are. I know that’s not a typical compliment girls want from a guy, but it was sweet. I appreciated it. The conversation made me laugh more than I thought it would. The conversation made me happier than I think it should.
So that’s my predicament. I may be catching feelings for a guy because of a dream that wasn’t real and a conveniently placed conversation. While I have a boyfriend. J’s going off to college at the end of the summer. Even if I start to deal with this situation when there isn’t a boyfriend in the picture, B is a flirt. He flirts with everyone. And he does things with girls. I haven’t even kissed J. I haven’t kissed anyone since middle school on a dare.
I need advice.